“just in time for the holidays”


from MARSHALL APPLEWHITE next mixtape Suburban Boredom, out now on little Scottish label CLANDESTINE RECORDS on cassette and digital.

He says “If EDM is drug music, I am the anti drug.” But there was another Marshall Applewhite who also said very particular things.

After divorce, without job, in the state of depression a gay music teacher from Texas, Marshall Applewhite, the reincarnation of Jesus Christ met a woman who used to got instructions from a monk Brother Francis from the 19th century. They identified themselves as the two witness of God which are described by John the Revelator in his nightmare after an overabundant late supper. Those two have authority of prophesy, have power over sky and waters, and able to strike the earth with plague. They also concluded that they had been chosen to full fill biblical prophecies, so they went to proselytization tour, but without any success. Maybe because

“It would be impossible to explain to you who we are, where we come from, and who we represent. If we tried, you would not believe us. We exist in another dimension, which does not allow for the use of currency.”

This quote is taken from one of their sacred messages. This one was found in their room in a Holiday Inn.

The essence of their catechism

We have superior souls which are from other space and planted into our human bodies. We are here to teach people how to reach the next level of existence. To reach this state need to strip all the human habits and emotions, for example must to jettison from the luxury of thinking too. And when the time will come a spaceship will come for the true believers and take their souls to the Heaven and everybody else will die in a final fire shower.

The time came in 1997 with Comet Hale-Bopp, when an amateur astronomer took a photograph which showed a large metallic object behind the comet. So the 39 members of Heaven’s Gate group prepared themselves for the journey as guidance by the spiritual leader.

At first everybody went and bought the same type of black Nike shoes – because of the Nike logo is similar to a comet, but a “Heaven’s Gate Away Team” armband, passport, driving licence, a 5 dollar bill and some change also were needed. The latter because so they will be able to call home.

Finally they released their souls from the human body with a mix of medication of epilepsy, vodka and apple sauce, and before the final exit they set plastic bags on their heads. But they all slipped on a banana peel. The photo of the comet with that UFO was fake. So they in vain took out insurance on alien abduction.


Today news: Psychiatrists have urged parents to stop telling kids about Father Christmas because it could undermine trust in their parents and lead to “abject disappointment”. “If parents can lie so convincingly and over such a long time, what else can they lie about?”



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